Are you searching for your equilibrium?

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michelle-gibbingsI remember learning about equilibrium in high school science. A state where everything is as it should be, and opposing forces or influences are in balance.

It appears to be such a perfect state. But as we all know – the world isn’t perfect, and holding a state of equilibrium is challenging.

It’s the same for individuals. Living a life in equilibrium where everything is perfectly balanced and in alignment appears aspirational. It is also something that is pitched as something we should all strive for.

Is that the case? Is work-life balance something we should all be striving for, or is it a constructed myth and unobtainable?

The answer to that question lies in how you define work-life balance.

And each person’s definition can and should be different, because what’s in balance for one person, is out of balance for another.

So the issue is not so much about finding work-life balance, but about finding the equilibrium that works for you, and then making deliberate choices to make that happen.

Your equilibrium and what works for you is a personal choice. But staking a claim and living your life in a way that is true to you can be hard.

There’s so much pressure in today’s society to live up to certain standards. It can make you feel that if you aren’t living the perfect life that you’re deficient. It is also so easy to compare yourself to others in a way that isn’t helpful or healthy.

So rather than wasting time living a life according to someone else’s standard, set your own equilibrium and live to that standard.

To do that you need to make conscious choices. The first step is to look at how you are spending your time.

Consider how much of your time is spent each week on:

  • Self-care: sleep, exercise, meditation, and other activities that are good for your health and well-being
  • Partner, family and friends: caring for others, socialising, spending time with people that matter to you etc
  • Career: working and activities associated with work
  • Lifestyle: leisure pursuits such as gardening, going to the movies or whatever it is you enjoy doing in your free time
  • Finance: organising and sorting out your financial goals and making progress towards them
  • Learning: reading, learning and practising new ideas and skills, and participating in courses

Once you’ve done that ask yourself (and answer honestly) – “When I look at that allocation of time it makes me feel…”

  • Content and fulfilled
  • Anxious, angry or concerned
  • Ambivalent and unsure

Or it may provoke another emotion. It’s important to critically examine how it makes you feel as tapping in to that reaction will help you know whether you are living your life in equilibrium.

And if you aren’t, the only person who can change that is you…

As Eleanor Roosevelt said: “One’s philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes… and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility.”

So, be conscious of your choices. What you are choosing to do? What you are choosing not to do?

What are the choices you are making to set yourself up for the life you deserve and want?

Take a chance. Make a choice.

Change happens. Make it work for you.

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